Goping through separation or divorce? What you do next matters!

“If you just tell me…like ‘dude, you’re a bit messed up you need about ten sessions, around $100 each, that’s 1,000 bucks,’ I’d be like, ‘cool bro.’ I’d budget for that”

This quote was published in Australian Psychologist: 'Men in and out of treatment for depression: Strategies for improved engagement'. Dr. Zac Seidler, the author, says mental health therapists need to alter the way they deliver treatment if it's to have an effective impact on the male suicide epidemic. "A lot more of men now seek help but many aren't engaging with their treatment and therefore don't stay as long as they should," he said.

"It would be more appropriate to use masculine traits like risk- taking and wanting to regain strength to our advantage. Men tend to want an idea of how treatment is going to work from the outset, a structured plan for working towards recovery, the power to gain skills that help them deal with depression and to feel in control of their lives."

Taking these points into account here’s how I set up my divorce coaching sessions:

1. The sessions are done through zoom or in my “office” – which is a paddock. We’ll walk and talk, enjoying nature, the horses, and the beautiful scenery of the Dandenong ranges in Victoria.

2. You are encouraged to bring a mate along – coaching can be daunting, especially if it’s your first time. Having someone who can support you can be beneficial. We can focus on some ways they can keep supporting you after the session.

3. The sessions follow a 7-step system designed to get men from awarness to freedom in 7 weeks.

Want to know more? Download the Separation Survival Guide. You can also listen to the Divorce Cowboy podcast to listen to men who went through separation and got up back again.


- Here's Why it's Still Really Hard to Get Men to Go to Therapy-

- Mental health clinicians need to better engage men with depression-


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