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What I did in the first three months after my partner's "separation announcement" determined the rest of my life. Here’s why: 80% of divorces are initiated by women. On average, a woman will spend about two years thinking about the divorce before acting.
This means that when a woman says: "I want to separate", she's in a state of conclusion after deliberation. The man is usually in the opposite state of mind. He’s probably hearing about it for the first time (often by ignoring or denying the signs).
The two sides are now in a completely different emotional spaces: The woman is tired and angry. She wants to get it done. The man is in shock and disbelief. He wants to stop and understand.
This is the moment the relationship bridge, that was eroding for some time, turns into the gorge of mistrust. This is not a safe space to negotiate critical future decisions involving kids, property, and finance. Therefore, I created a resource called: "The healthy separation agreement".
It’s a collection of agreements, that together create a shared vision for a healthy separation. It also gives men three months to “level up” their emotional state, build resilience and find inner strength. It allows men to find a healthy, grounded and balanced place, which is a far better position to negotiate from.
PS. If you’d like to know more, get some clarity, or simply share your story, I’m here to support you.
